Tonight, I went to my first of four rehearsals. It was very laid back, and the director went out of her way to make sure everyone felt comfortable. (donuts - yum!)
Introductions were made, and then we read through our parts.
I was surprised and excited to discover that each person really embodied the monologue they were chosen for. I watched them as they read, and it was as though these stories belonged to them.
I wondered what that said about me, and if other people felt the same.
I wasn't really nervous this go-round, to my delight, which gave me a chance to try some new things when reading the part. It was a really supportive group, and everyone clapped and cheered whenever a monologue was finished.
I was to choose a person in real life and practice as though I am speaking to that person. When I did that however, I was unable to get my mother out of my mind.
She hates the word cunt. Suddenly I felt defensive and small.
This was not the way to go.
In the end, I decided to perform the monologue as though taking the word back was empowering and sexy. It felt a LOT better. :)